Balancing Acts: Author Kaila Nike On How To Thrive As A Working Mother

We had the pleasure of talking with Kaila Nike. Born and raised in British Columbia, Kaila Nike is a dedicated mother raising two wonderful sons. While she earned a diploma in social work, writing has always been her true passion. Finding solace and expression in her words, Kaila focuses on crafting engaging narratives through poetry and romantasy.

Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dive into our discussion about celebrating working mothers, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?

Thank you for the opportunity to be interviewed. Sure thing, I have always had a passion for writing, even as a young girl, but it wasn’t followed. I guess I could say that I wasn’t fully aware of the things I was passionate about doing because I was too busy trying to ‘make it’. I had my first son at a young age and after he was born, I decided that it was time for me to go back to school and complete my grade twelve. From there, I went to college to study in the field of social services. My main priority had always been to provide for my family and that meant sacrificing some of the things I loved to do the most. I went to work at a typical job, but I never lost the urge to want to do more or be more, so I would often look into side hustles and give those a go. Unfortunately none of those ever worked out for me. But even then I didn’t lose that spark that kept me wanting more. It wasn’t until I lost a job that I quite enjoyed that I decided it was time for me to follow my passion. By this time I had many ideas for stories, never brave enough to write any of them, or too busy to find the time. But there was one story that has always been on my mind and when I lost this job, somehow I knew that it was time for me to follow my passion and start writing it. And that’s exactly what I did and haven’t looked back since.

Can you share a moment or story that happened to you where you were inspired or given hope that there could be successful parenting while building and growing a meaningful career?

Definitely. I have inspirational people that I look up to, that have given me hope all throughout my journey. Of those people, one of the main ones that keeps me propelling forward is J.K. Rowling. It’s public knowledge that she was a single mother living in poverty when her work became huge. I know that I am determined, and when I hear stories from people like J.K. Rowling and Oprah Winfrey, it fuels me to continue, no matter how hard the path might seem at the time. My kids are older now and they completely understand that sometimes I need to juggle work and parenting time, and they cheer me on. They want me to follow my dreams and to succeed.

It is exciting to be here with you today celebrating your success. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to that success? Can you please share a story or example for each?

Perseverance is a key trait that has led me to where I am today. Times do get tough but it’s the ones who don’t quit who make it. One example I can provide is that when I wrote my book Mystique, the first draft was awful. And I mean awful! But rather than getting down on myself, I accepted it for what it was and sought help to make it better, and over the course of about eight months, I transformed that first draft into what it is today. It might not be an award winner, but I know how much time and effort that was put into that manuscript, and that in itself is an accomplishment.

Decisiveness is another trait that I would like to highlight. Sometimes you have to make decisions, and make them quickly. Once things are on the go, it can go so fast you don’t really even know how it happened. When I chose a narrator for Mystique, the audition pool was large and of course I could have taken my sweet time choosing one, but I knew the vision I had in mind for how I wanted them to sound. I needed to go through all the auditions and make my final decision fairly quickly because these people are waiting on a response because they are running a business too and can’t just be sitting around waiting to hear if they got the role or not. I had to close my additions after the first day because they were flooding in, and I chose my narrator in a matter of 2 days. If I had waited, or couldn’t make a decision, I could have lost the opportunity to work with someone I really wanted to and could have had to settle with a second choice.

Accountability. I don’t have anyone to tell me what to do. I need to figure out and learn everything for myself. And that means holding myself accountable and doing the things that I sometimes don’t even want to do. Writing is the easy part of my career but there are things that don’t come so easily, like marketing, and it’s up to me to push myself to keep my vision clear and keep pressing on and doing the things that help to make me successful.

Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the primary focus of our interview. Can you share a personal story that highlights the balancing act of being a working mother?

Deadlines. I like having deadlines because it helps to keep me on track, but it also interferes with my personal life because I tend to work harder and it can take time away from my kids. How I manage this is by using all my scheduled minutes as effectively as possible so that by the time the kids get home, I don’t have so much on my plate and can give them more time. We communicate effectively, if they know I have a deadline coming up, they are well aware that they might need to make their own dinner that night so that I can meet my deadline. But I do my best ahead of time so that I don’t get myself into the conflict of having to choose between work and my kids.

What has been your most effective strategy for balancing work commitments with your responsibilities as a parent?

It definitely is a balancing act. I have created a schedule for myself so that I am able to get the majority of important tasks done while the kids are at school, once they are home I am able to focus on some of the easier tasks. While they are home, I don’t like to work too hard because I do still enjoy spending quality time with them. It’s really all about finding that balance and knowing when to take days off and when I need time to complete projects. We talk often and they are well aware of my work responsibilities and schedule and the schedule I have created works for us.

Can you share a significant challenge you faced as a working mother and how you overcame it?

I just couldn’t get over the fact that I was a single mom. I didn’t go into parenthood thinking ‘yeah, I want to be a single parent and do everything by myself’. It was one of the biggest mind flusters that I needed to overcome. And how I began to accept that is knowing that I get to do everything my own way (such as parenting styles), and I get all the time with them and they are my whole world so I wouldn’t change it for anything.

Some employers are hesitant to hire moms and especially single mothers. Will you tell us a story about your productivity and accomplishments and how being a mom actually assisted you at work?

If anything, hiring a single parent would be beneficial for a business as they would bring a highly admirable set of skills to the workplace. The necessity of managing a household, finances, and a career all by yourself forges unique skill sets. We become absolute experts in prioritization, time management, and efficiency. We simply can’t afford wasted time, so we get things done. This translates directly into employees who are masters of focused work, who handle multiple projects with unflappable resilience in a crisis, and who are incredibly resourceful. We bring an elevated level of accountability and drive to every project, turning us into huge assets for any team. When I go to work, I bring the same level of determination I do when managing my household. I always strive to be great, no matter the setting.

How do you prioritize self-care amidst your busy schedule?

My self care routine comes in after the kids have gone to bed and that typically entails some video games and a nice hot bath before bed. I do like to see my friends sometimes as well, so we will plan a get together for coffee and sometimes I bring my kids, and sometimes I don’t as they are now old enough to stay home.

How do you find time and energy for personal development?

Personal development has always had a place. For as long as I’ve been an adult, personal development has been like second nature, whether that’s going for walks, gym, hiking, biking etc. and staying active, to reading or listening to audiobooks. I have personal development leaders who send emails straight to my inbox so it is incorporated when I check my emails. Personal development has become such a habit that it is just integrated into everything that I do and is second nature.

Ok super. Here is the main question of our interview. Based on your experience and research, can you please share “5 Things You Need to Thrive as a Working Mother?” Please share a story with each one.

1 . I have to say that having a support system in place is number one. In order to thrive, you need people who you can trust to surround you, people you can lean on when times get tough, people you trust who can babysit, having a shoulder to cry on, even having an accountability partner if it’s needed. It’s so hard to make it in this world alone, it’s okay to have others to support you along the way. There are days I need some time to complete projects and I can rely on my family members to take the kids so that I can complete what I need to.

2 . Having a schedule is a life saver, it helps to keep me focused and on track. A to-do list goes hand in hand with a schedule. I like to keep a visual of the things I need to do, when it’s in writing, it’s easy to follow, allowing me to work more efficiently. Before having a schedule things seemed to get forgotten, or I didn’t make it a priority and that can leave things messy.

3 . Self care is super important. If you feel down about yourself then it can reflect in your work and efficiency. Self care helps to build a positive image of yourself, not only consciously but unconsciously as well, and you really notice the difference when you make yourself a priority. Everything around you shifts for the better. There was a period of about six months when I stopped working out because I was dealing with some personal grief, and as time went on I could see it in my body and my confidence. It took a lot of mental effort to get back into the rhythm of things, but once I did I could feel my confidence and productivity coming back to life. Another thing that I like to prioritize is adult time, whether that’s playing video games or having coffee with friends, having adult time is important for mental health.

4 . Having reliable, trustworthy, and affordable child care is a huge asset. Having the kids in school helps, but there are times outside of school where things just need to either a) get done, or b) you need some much needed self care time to yourself. And having people around you to rely on can make a huge difference for your success, productivity, and even your mental health.

5 . Financial security. No matter how much or how little a person makes, there needs to be some kind of financial security because you can’t raise kids with no money. Budgeting, finding a way to bring in extra income if needed, accessing resources, and withholding from careless spending can play a significant role in your success.

What support systems or resources have been crucial in helping you manage both parenting and your career?

Friends and family. The support I receive from the people I care about the most is honestly a huge contributor as to what keeps me going.

What advice would you give to single mothers striving to achieve success in their careers while raising children?

If it feels like what you’re doing is aligned with your overall vision of the person you want to become, then don’t quit. Don’t ever give up. Times will get hard, and you will want to sometimes. But find a way to keep going. Take a break if you need to, but don’t give up.

You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)

I believe that women having to fight for their rights should be a thing of the past. No one should get to tell a woman what to do with her body. There are different reasons why women terminate pregnancies. If she wants to terminate a pregnancy, that should be her decision to make and the government, or anyone else for that matter, should not be allowed to have a say in that.

How can our readers further follow you online?

My website is kailanike.com and I can be found on Facebook, Tiktok, and sometimes even Instagram, all under the username kailanikeauthor. I love hearing from fans of my work so please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great

Thanks again for this amazing opportunity.