Assil Omar Of AbbVie On How Authenticity and Vulnerability Pay Off and Help You Win Personally and Professionally

Being vulnerable and authentic are some of today’s popular buzzwords. It may seem counterintuitive to be vulnerable, as many of us have been taught to project an air of confidence, be a boss, and act like we know everything. In Brene Brown’s words, “vulnerability takes courage.” So is vulnerability a strength or a weakness? Can someone be authentic without being vulnerable? How can being authentic and vulnerable help someone grow both personally and professionally? In this interview series we are talking to business leaders, mental health professionals and business and life coaches who can share stories and examples of “How Authenticity and Vulnerability Pay Off and Help You Win Personally and Professionally.” As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Assil Omar, vice president of Talent Acquisition and Human Capital Planning for AbbVie.

Assil Omar, vice president, Talent Acquisition and Human Capital Planning, AbbVie, is responsible for building and implementing programs and capabilities to acquire and retain top talent, including forecasting and understanding talent needs across the organization. Previously, Assil was AbbVie’s vice president, Human Capital Strategy, charged with establishing AbbVie’s HR roadmap, digital and data strategies. Assil’s experience across geographies and industries has fueled her passion for bold business strategies requiring innovative solutions, which unlocks the human potential in talent, teams, and systems. Assil holds a Master of Arts degree in Education from the University of Toronto.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we start, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?

In the vein of vulnerability, my story is not something I share often. As an Arab woman, I was born a Palestinian refugee and at 16-years-old I had to navigate life in a foreign country with different customs than my own. However, I learned how to be a chameleon — adapting to new environments quickly, doing my best to blend in and build connections as I went. I saw opportunities to take risks and, regardless of where my path took me, I did so with humility. I’ve been incredibly fortunate to have led and grown a dynamic career in a variety of roles and within different countries. This is largely due to the support of great leaders and mentors I’ve had in my corner. I’ve seen firsthand the impact of a more inclusive and authentic culture driven by vulnerability and authenticity. This is what inspires me to share my story more broadly. The story of a refugee advancing in their career is not one that’s often in the corporate narrative. But as vice president of a global company, I am more driven to share my story, serve as a role model and empower others in terms of what diversity and inclusion can look like in leadership.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

Brene Brown’s infamous quote, “You either walk inside your story and own it or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness,” is a favorite of mine and is also very relevant in the context of this interview.

This quote really resonates with me because I learned what it’s like to hustle for worthiness, especially in the first half of my career and throughout my life. As an expatriate living and working away from my home country, I hustled to fit in. As an Arab woman, I hustled to establish myself in my career. As a nomad, I hustled to understand the world around me. As a working mom, I hustled to balance all responsibilities. But I can say, without a doubt, that all the hustling made me into the person I am today. While it’s taken me some time, I am finding the courage to really walk inside my own story and even celebrate my successes. It’s important to understand and harness the best ways to utilize the gifts you’ve been given to succeed, refer to the hard times to know what you’re capable of, and continue to remain grounded in your story and know your roots.

Is there a particular book, podcast, or film that made a significant impact on you? Can you share a story or explain why it resonated with you so much?

Late last year I heard an episode on Gwyneth Paltrow’s The goop Podcast that stuck with me and I’ve listened to it several times since. The podcast, “Becoming the Next Iteration of Yourself,” featured Jay Shetty, New York Times Bestselling Author and former coach and monk.

What captured my attention was how Shetty prioritized the importance of our relationship with ourselves and the power of the mind. Specifically, he discussed the idea of training your mind to be where you are, to do uncomfortable things, and to not only do what feels good in the moment. He brought up the notion of choosing to sit with discomfort and how it can set us up for success versus the alternative — “I don’t like this so I’m moving on.” This really resonated with me because it enforced the benefit of leaving your comfort zone to grow. Another phrase he used, “you can’t be what you can’t see,” reiterated that there is great value in exposing ourselves to new ideas, people, places, cultures, and beliefs to expand on our possibilities.

I try to listen to this podcast periodically because it puts me in the right frame of mind to redirect and retrain my thoughts.

Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion. Let’s begin with a definition of terms so that each of us and our readers are on the same page. What exactly does being authentic mean?

I think being authentic means being self-aware, genuine, and true to the way you interact with others. During my time in leadership development, I was exposed to the great work of businessman and academic, Bill George, around authentic leadership. He places great importance on uncovering your true purpose and values as driving factors to authenticity in leadership and relationships. For example, if a leader knows that his or her values align with the company they represent, they will be much more connected to the purpose of that organization. In turn, everyone wins: Their employees will have an authentic leader with a clear purpose. The company will gain a valuable asset aligned to that purpose. And the leader will know they have landed in the right role, where they can be their true self.

Purpose-driven leaders have a bigger impact, they gain more authentic followership — and in turn that drives higher performance, engagement and outcomes. So, I would say that the need for authenticity in the workplace is growing at an exponential rate and the best companies know to value this type of leader.

What does being vulnerable mean? Can you explain?

Most dictionaries define “vulnerability” as risk or exposure to harm. While vulnerability is exposure or risk, it’s also necessary to foster growth, trust, innovation and a sense of belonging. These are all increasingly valued traits in leaders, teams and organizations that, backed by research, correlates these traits to driving higher performance, innovation and business outcomes. Not to mention, the impact piece — having an impact on the world we work and live in.

Vulnerability to me has been moments of deep connection, soul searching and an understanding that it is OK to not always have the right answers. I now know the value of a safe environment that allows, and even encourages, failures and the importance of fostering the right relationships and teams to help get to the best answers, ideas and outcomes.

What are the positive aspects of being authentic and vulnerable? Can you give a story or example to explain what you mean?

I believe it’s very hard to be authentic without being vulnerable, perhaps even impossible — the two go hand-in-hand. I can’t see how someone can bring forward their authentic, genuine self and values without vulnerability. By taking a position of, “I know everything and have all the answers,” no one can truly be authentic or vulnerable. In turn, a company’s culture, teams and performance will ultimately suffer.

By being afraid to be wrong or take risks, we jeopardize the ability to truly connect with others limiting free-form, innovative thinking that can inspire new ideas, approaches and solutions. As a result, without vulnerability, you are less able to generate high-performing teams that are pushing each other, which in my opinion is a big miss.

I believe vulnerability is unequivocally a strength. I am a strong believer that one can develop vulnerability through role models. The more open-minded you are and willing to enable others to help you, you allow space for self-growth, which creates stronger relationships and a more authentic you.

For example, some of the most inspiring, groundbreaking leaders and thinkers — Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King Jr., Oprah, Indra Nooyi, Jacinda Ardern — have exemplified vulnerability and authenticity through humility and a genuine nature. I’ve been closely following Microsoft’s CEO Satya Nadella’s approach and leadership in how he has transformed the company into a dominant cloud services provider. He is quoted as the most successful CEO in the technology industry and is known for his leadership approach: a clear vision, ability to energize teams, courage, humility, empathy and genuine care. Not only is he very successful, but very vulnerable.

Are there negative aspects to authenticity and vulnerability? Can you give a story or example to explain what you mean?

It’s easy to talk about all the highlights here, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t speak about how much work (inside and out) and practice it takes to be a truly vulnerable leader. We need to be mindful of the impact we seek to make on those around us and the context we are operating in. We must also be careful in how we project strength and inspire confidence to avoid coming across as self-absorbed or self-serving. Being vulnerable and authentic doesn’t mean brushing context and judgement aside.

It’s easy to confuse being authentic with being vulnerable — a leader who says they are being authentic but instead comes across as self-absorbed can have the opposite effect in building trust. I’ve seen firsthand how this type of behavior can isolate teams by making it hard for them to truly find their value and express a differing point of view. This is why the most impactful leaders must demonstrate authentic vulnerability without expecting anything in return.

Another hard aspect of being vulnerable is that it requires a person to put more out into the world — to be out of their comfort zone — which could sometimes backfire. Taking down barriers also makes us naturally more exposed. Vulnerable leaders are usually more emotionally invested, which can be a hard thing to manage from an energy standpoint. It takes so much more effort. I can admit that there are days where my tank is empty. This is where self- awareness and prioritizing self-care are extremely important.

From your experience or perspective, what are some of the common barriers that hold someone back from being authentic and vulnerable?

For decades, the tendency for most companies has been to maintain more top-down, leadership, which can act as a context barrier to becoming more vulnerable and authentic. That said, we are seeing a palpable shift away from this context toward fostering an inclusive workplace that prioritizes diversity, inclusion, empowerment and psychology safety. This shift helps address key barriers to authenticity and vulnerability. The urgency for this shift has been heightened by the pandemic and an environment of exponential uncertainty over the past few years. Without feeling safe or a sense of belonging, how can we be our true selves at work or otherwise?

There are also more personal barriers. Many of us are top achievers who set a high bar for ourselves and work hard to avoid vulnerability. There is “internal” work that may need to happen to be truly vulnerable and authentic, such as discovering our purpose, living our values, testing and practicing these skills.

Here is the central question of our discussion. What are five ways that being authentic and vulnerable pay off, and help you win, both personally and professionally?

Without a doubt, authenticity and vulnerability is the lion’s share of my own personal and professional growth. Over the last few decades and touted by many leadership experts, proverbial “soft skills” — vulnerability, self-awareness, empathy, trust, conflict management — have consistently been underscored as critical for high-performing organizations and leadership.

Here are a few lessons I’ve learned along the way:

1. Take Risks: I learned early and quickly, that putting myself out there — taking assignments in foreign countries where I had no familiarity, or in roles with disciplines where I had no formal training or experience — were critical to me achieving my career and life aspirations in the long run. These things were scary, but I still found myself stepping up to the challenge head-on despite the fear of “imposter syndrome,” and often not knowing if I would be successful. I was very vulnerable, but I learned more about myself and my abilities than I ever thought possible. Take the risk.
2. Make Connections: I’ve been blessed with extraordinary mentors and sponsors who not only taught me a lot of what I know today but supported me by taking big bets on me and playing a central role in my success. I started my career at a Kuwait-based company and ended up in big roles at top-tier organizations like Unilever and AbbVie. This was in large part due to the mentors with whom I forged deep relationships with along the way, who believed in me and encouraged me to be more of my true, authentic self. They helped me embrace what makes me different. They helped me build competence and confidence along the way.
3. Be a Safe Space: I consider myself to be a “people person.” I invest a tremendous amount of energy, care and time into my colleagues and the teams I’ve led. As a leader, the importance of building trust, psychological safety and having open, honest relationships is not lost on me, and this is where I thrive. I tend to gravitate toward leaders who do the same. The soft skills that it takes to foster genuine, human connections are the same ones I feel are valuable both professionally and personally.
4. Foster Growth and Development: Growth and development are integral to anyone’s journey, personally and professionally. When you cultivate a culture where vulnerability is viewed as a strength, employees are not afraid to try new things, make mistakes, learn, and advance. This fosters a workplace where employees can innovate, stretch, grow, and develop. As a leader, I consider it a success when I see this environment in action and employees are developing both personally and professionally.
5. Be a Better Human and Leader: Author Simon Sinek recently said, “Human skills are the skills that make better leaders and better human beings,” and that couldn’t be more accurate in my experience. Leaders who exemplify human skills are difference makers and vulnerability is one of those core human skills that is shown in the best leaders.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?

Inspiring a movement is a big task. Perhaps, aligned to my lessons learned above, I would want to inspire a “better human” movement. I believe we all intrinsically want to be better versions of ourselves and are driven by some of the same things. It’s my mantra, in everything I do I ask myself, “am I being a better human?” It’s easy to overlook the human element when we talk corporate strategies, goals, initiatives, targets or even when we talk about differences in cultures, nations, etc. It may sound simplistic, but the idea of bringing in the human factor in all that we do can be the difference that makes a difference at a micro and macro level.

Is there a person in the world whom you would love to have lunch with and why? Maybe we can tag them and see what happens!

My grandmother was an incredible woman with so much heart and wisdom to share. She passed away when I was only 17 and so suddenly that I didn’t feel like I had the chance to hear her whole story. I’d love a chance to talk to her over a meal and ask her about life lessons and even gain even more historical context about her life and our family that I never had the chance to discuss with her. I also believe she would be proud of my progress and of the progress of all her other grandchildren — she always had such high hopes for us.

How can our readers follow you online?

My LinkedIn profile is the best way to follow me.

This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for the time you spent on this. We wish you only continued success.

About The Interviewer: Maria Angelova, MBA is a disruptor, author, motivational speaker, body-mind expert, Pilates teacher and founder and CEO of Rebellious Intl. As a disruptor, Maria is on a mission to change the face of the wellness industry by shifting the self-care mindset for consumers and providers alike. As a mind-body coach, Maria’s superpower is alignment which helps clients create a strong body and a calm mind so they can live a life of freedom, happiness and fulfillment. Prior to founding Rebellious Intl, Maria was a Finance Director and a professional with 17+ years of progressive corporate experience in the Telecommunications, Finance, and Insurance industries. Born in Bulgaria, Maria moved to the United States in 1992. She graduated summa cum laude from both Georgia State University (MBA, Finance) and the University of Georgia (BBA, Finance). Maria’s favorite job is being a mom. Maria enjoys learning, coaching, creating authentic connections, working out, Latin dancing, traveling, and spending time with her tribe. To contact Maria, email her at angelova@rebellious-intl.com. To schedule a free consultation, click here.